tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-22566217768191318862024-03-13T17:39:02.232+08:00Jokes and Quotes BulletinDISCLAIMER NOTICE: The quotes and jokes are not mine. They are sent via mobile from my friends. I got the others from pages in facebook.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.comBlogger1072125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-22048164147693971312012-07-05T19:35:00.003+08:002012-07-05T19:35:50.417+08:00It Kills ThemBe happy in front of the people who don't like you, it kills them. :DAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-20798084110214397442012-06-23T18:59:00.002+08:002012-06-23T18:59:14.565+08:00If You're Trying,I'm StayingI can't promise you a perfect relationship, but what I can promise you is that if you're trying, i'm staying.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-85396030776221504442012-06-23T18:57:00.002+08:002012-06-23T18:57:38.164+08:00Warranty ExpiredAn angry bird was not happy with his wife, so he sent the following message to his mother-in-law. "Your product does not match my requirements."<br />
<br />
The smart mother-in-law replied,"Warranty expired: manufacturer not responsible after the seal is broken."Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-16917939509989369612012-06-23T18:55:00.002+08:002012-06-23T18:55:25.633+08:00Eh Bakit Ikaw?<b>Wife: </b>Honey, ibili mo naman ako ng bra.<br />
<br />
<b>Husband: </b>Honey, wag kana magbra, maliit naman dede mo eh.<br />
<br />
<b>Wife: </b>(taas kilay) Eh, bakit ikaw naka brief?Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-33415051807416281492012-06-20T19:27:00.002+08:002012-06-20T19:27:40.661+08:00In PairsYou know why God made eyes in pair, ears in pair, hands in pair, legs in pair, while HEART is single?<br />
<br />
For it to find its pair.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-91363839047769501972012-06-20T19:24:00.002+08:002012-06-20T19:24:36.852+08:00Parang GobyernoAng Gf parang gobyerno lang yan. Maraming ipinagbabawal. Samantalang ang BF parang pulitiko, maraming pangakong puro naman napapako.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-17468722185579962212012-06-20T19:22:00.001+08:002012-06-20T19:22:12.928+08:00Miss, Anong Oras Na?<b>Boy: </b>Miss, pwede magtanong? Anong oras na?<br />
<br />
<b>Girl: </b>Nagtatanong ka ng oras? Tapos, itatanong mo pangalan ko? Tapos, hihingin mo number ko? Tapos, liligawan mo ako? Tapos, after one month na pacharming-charming, sasagutin kita. Tapos, bibisita ka sa bahay. Tapos magde-date tayo. Syempre, pakipot naman ako. Tapos, dadalhin mo ako sa motel! Tapos, may mangayayari sa atin. Tapos, mabubuntis ako? Tapos, pakakasal tayo! Tapos, bubugbugin mo lang ako! At pano na ang bata? Kaya hindi! Hindi ko sasabihin kung anong oras na!<br />
<br />
<b>Boy: </b>??? (speechless)Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-12479260882219722022012-06-08T16:18:00.002+08:002012-06-08T16:18:56.953+08:00Thumb MarkAling Dionisia in a bank<br />
<br />
<b>Teller: </b>Maám may ID ba kayo na may picture?<br />
<b>Dionisia: </b>May pecture naman yang ID ko ah!<br />
<br />
Tinignan ulit ng teller ang ID<br />
<br />
<b>Teller: </b>Ay meron po pala. Sorry po. Kala ko thumb mark.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-36944452716694709942012-06-08T16:17:00.001+08:002012-06-08T16:17:23.869+08:00Maria Go<b>Teacher: </b>Verb is an action word. Juan give me an example.<br />
<b>Juan: </b>Went maám.<br />
<b>Teacher: </b>Very good! Use it in a sentence.<br />
<b>Jaun: </b>Maria go went to twon.<br />
<b>Teacher: </b>Wrong! Kung gagamit ka ng went wala na yung go.<br />
<b>Juan: </b>Maám yung go po apelyido ni Maria. Intindihin mo po kasi. Hindi ung lagi ka nagmamagaling.<br />
<b>Teacher: </b>(nga-nga)<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-45803874260954186512012-06-08T14:17:00.000+08:002012-06-08T14:17:33.149+08:00life is a surpriseWe never know what really will happen to us each day and we never choose things that will be happening. So, let each day and all the days of our life be a surprise of what things will bring us, may it be happy or sad, exciting or boring, scary or fearless, forgettable or memorable. But one thing I want to wish from God, is to keep you safe. Give you love and courage. and give you the comfort of life that you deserve.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-83539809676321653892012-06-08T13:59:00.002+08:002012-06-08T13:59:30.695+08:00Sayo ako ikakasalDi bale ng hindi kumain ng INASAL, oh maging sing talino ni RIZAL matupad lang ang aking DASAL na saýo ako IKAKASAL.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-79974951287753294992012-06-08T13:24:00.002+08:002012-06-08T13:24:26.894+08:00For FreeLove as much as you can because aside from dreaming , loving is the next best thing that you could avail for free.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-75951918473055506582012-05-08T14:03:00.001+08:002012-05-08T14:03:22.083+08:00It's Not The Mistake That MattersIt's not the mistake that matter, it's how you deal with it, what you learn from it, and how you apply that lesson to your life.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-68710651977446360172012-05-08T13:17:00.002+08:002012-05-08T13:17:17.013+08:00Appreciation of What We HaveAppreciate life even if it's not perfect. Contentment is not the fulfillment of what we wish for, but an appreciation of what we have.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-83372626438907810212012-05-08T13:10:00.002+08:002012-05-08T13:10:31.512+08:00New StartNever use your failure yesterday as an excuse for not trying again. We may not be able to undo the damages but we can always make a new start.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-7214633627567803662012-05-08T12:54:00.003+08:002012-05-08T12:54:41.995+08:00Chance To Wake UpIt's always a blessing to realize you still have the chance to wake up every morning even if you have sometimes failed to pray at night.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-59196755280020704122012-05-08T12:52:00.002+08:002012-05-08T12:52:12.559+08:00Never The SameLearn to value the people around you because once you LOSE someone, it is never exactly the same person who comes back.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-47359699056651962252012-05-08T12:51:00.000+08:002012-05-08T12:51:09.615+08:00Home BuddyA fact:<br />
Most singles spend their free time at home. Then they wonder why they never meet anybody.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-31337943097627666342012-05-08T11:52:00.002+08:002012-05-08T11:52:48.916+08:00What Can BeEveryday is a new beginning. So, stay away from might have been and look at what can be.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-85238131301161928462012-05-02T18:51:00.001+08:002012-05-02T18:51:54.912+08:00Ayoko Ko Ng Ingles<b>Dionisia: </b>Ayuko na ng Ingles, hirap intindihin!<br />
<b>Manny: </b>Bakit naman?<br />
<b>Dionisia: </b>Eh pano, ang isda, pis, ang mukha, pis, ang pandikit, pis, ang kapayapaan, pis, ang kapiraso, pis. Pati sa subdivision may pis 1, pis 2, pis 3!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-76367103641906187462012-05-02T18:48:00.001+08:002012-05-02T18:48:09.815+08:00Braha Ka Ba?<b>Boy: </b>Braha ka ba?<br />
<b>Girl: </b>Bakit?<br />
<b>Boy: </b>Ikaw kasi ang queen of hearts ko eh.<br />
<b>Girl: </b>Braha ka ba?<br />
<b>Boy: </b>Bakit?<br />
<b>Girl: </b>Ang sarap mo kasing IBALASA eh.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-43129717996890780892012-05-02T18:46:00.001+08:002012-05-02T18:46:20.713+08:00If You Can Hold OnWhat makes life confusing is when you can't determine if things are signs for you to give up or just tests to see if you can hold on for long.Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-14306658941712495542012-03-02T17:59:00.003+08:002012-03-02T17:59:39.271+08:00Parte ng Buhyay ang Pagiging Malungkot<div style="text-align: justify;">
Parte ng buhay ang pagiging malungkot, pero gagawin mo dapat ang lahat ng makakaya mo para maiwasan ito. Napakasandali lang ng oras para lumigaya, tapos isisingit mo pa ang kalungkutan na nararamdaman mo. Saan ka na lang pupulutin niyan? Sino pa ang aasahan mong tutulong sayo? Yung taong piniling saktan ka at pabayaan? </div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Mas kilala mo ang sarili mo. Hindi naman niya nakikita na malungkot ka ngayon e, hindi bat para kang lugi sa ginagawa mo? Habang ikaw na malungkot , siya naman tong hindi ka napapansin at nagsasaya.</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-51541916978657815362012-03-02T17:58:00.000+08:002012-03-02T17:58:03.747+08:00Dear Girls<div style="text-align: justify;">
Dear Girls,</div>
<div style="text-align: justify;">
Di lahat ng lalake pare-pareho. Pinaiyak ka man ng una, pinaluha ng pangalawa at yung pangatlo ay pinagmukha kang tanga. May lalake paring darating at ituturing kang prinsesa.</div>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2256621776819131886.post-16629937445037814792012-02-26T16:22:00.000+08:002012-02-26T16:22:24.774+08:00Vice Ganda VS. Asiong Salonga<b>Asiong : </b>Aken ang lupang ito!<br /><br /><b>Vice : </b>Sayo na !<br /><br /><b>Asiong:</b> Ako ang hari ng tondo!<br /><br /><b>Vice:</b> Bakit may papeles ka?!<br /><br /><b>Asiong:</b> May gatas ka pa sa labi<br /><br /><b>Vice:</b> Hinde milo yan .<br /><br /><b>Asiong:</b> Hayup ka!<br /><br /><b>Vice:</b> Natural kabayo ako!Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/14514958908767035527noreply@blogger.com0